It's Come 'Round.

I suppose I deserve this...

Last time, it was me doing the forgetting. Now, they're the ones forgetting me.

But, I'm not even gone yet. That's the hardest part to come to grips with. It's understandable to lose sight of someone when distance separates you, but how is it so easily done when there's no geographical excuse?

I'm feeling a bit hyper-sensitive these days; that must account (at least partially) for these bizarre, juvenile feelings of abandonment. I feel unimportant in the eyes of some of my friends, in a time when I most need to feel supported. I am never very needy when it comes to my friendships - a downfall of mine is that I don't show a lot of emotion and I'm too prideful (a lot of the time) to ask for help or to appear weak. Perhaps, then, some of this is my doing; I've not given my friends any indication that I am struggling or in need of reassurance. They just expect me to be strong and unflinching. Yet, on the other hand, I feel that friends ought to be able to sense certain needs, without the other having to articulate them.

Are my expectations too high, and so regardless of the outcome here, I'll feel somehow slighted? Or, am I making excuses for people in lieu of some greater accountability to me and our relationship?

I think one of the great mysteries of life is the way in which character is revealed in unspectacular circumstances. I generally learn the most about others (and myself) through the trivialities of my day-to-day existence, and as a result, these trivialities cease to be so. They come to possess the truths about our idiosyncrasies, in some way a key to the hidden depths (or lack thereof) of our character.

Regardless of whether I am too difficult to please, or I'm allowing myself to make excuses for my friends, this period of time will come to be seen as tell-tale.

I'll just take my newfound impressions and go quietly...karma has dictated as much.